Friday, August 31, 2007

What season are you??

You Belong in Fall
Intelligent, introspective, and quite expressive at times...
You appreciate the changes in color, climate, and mood that fall brings
Whether you're carving wacky pumpkins or taking long drives, autumn is a favorite time of year for you

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Blessed beyond measure

My husband...yes my husband is joining the church!!!!!!!!!! I can't really express how this makes me feel. If I were only a better writer. My heart is full of gratitude. If I weren't afraid of heights I would probably shout it from the rooftops.

When I joined the church 5 1/2 years ago, I was the first in my family. I have prayed and hoped all these years that hubby would join the church. He has always been supportive in all that I do with the church and has gone a few times over the years but never really showed much interest. Recently, things that have happened in our life has caused him to think of his own mortality and so a few weeks ago he began the missionary lessons. They have been great lessons, filled with the spirit. I could see the wheels turning and could see him truly searching, pondering and praying. Last night he decided that he would be baptized and this will take place in a couple of weeks.

It's been amazing to see him go through this transformation. To have a court side seat to watch the spirit really work in his life. So many people have prayed for him and I know that this had an impact as well and I am thankful. I am so happy for him and for our family. I know with all my heart that he is making the right choice.

Could I be any more blessed? Could I be anymore thankful to my Heavenly Father? No, my heart is full and I am truly blessed beyond measure.

Monday, August 27, 2007

My son....the shoe bandit

So, this weekend I met one of my friends down at the farmers market in town. When we had sampled and bought all the fresh produce we could stand, we decided to check out a shoe store downtown because I needed a new pair of "way to expensive but I gotta fork over the dough because I have bad feet" shoes. It's a small store and I knew it wouldn't take long so we decided to brave it with my son in tow. After trying on many pairs of shoes both from the back and from the sale rack, I decided on a pair and then realized that I had left my purse in my car so I didn't have to carry it all over the market. The nice salesperson said she would hold the shoes for me while I ran to the car to get my money (my $9.00 in cash in my pocket wasn't going to cut it apparently).

So, off we go out of the store and down the street when I hear this strange thumping sound. I look down and see that my son has on one of his shoes and is holding the other and what is on the other foot you ask? , It was a size 10 men's dress shoe in black. Yep, I was mortified and of course my friend is just cracking up and so are several other people that saw the whole thing unfold. We turn around and march back in there so we can return the shoe to the sale rack. Luckily the nice salesperson just laughed instead of calling the police :o) When I asked my little shoe bandit what he thought he was doing, he said " I don't know mommy, I just wanted to play with it" They start so young with the life of crime these days.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Ever have one of those days

where you should have stayed in bed? Today was one of those days. Work was particularly difficult, my son got a naughty slip in preschool, there was a accident on the way home that had me stuck in traffic forever. I know, I shouldn't whine and I know that I'm so very blessed but some days the covers should have just stayed over the head you know?

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Sabotage??

Now, I ask you, if you rededicated yourself to your healthy lifestyle and you told this to let's say, your husband and you came home from work and found the pantry had your favorite oatmeal cream pies, chocolate covered raisins, ice cream in the freezer and oatmeal spice cookies, would the thought cross your mind "sabotage". Yeah, me either, it must have just been a crazy oversight.

But seriously, I need to resist the urge right now to walk over there and get a oatmeal cream pie. I can't expect hubby and son to not have any treats just because I am a weakling. I am just going to keep my fingers on the keyboard and then they can't be stuffing things in the mouth right? Good plan, I like it.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Yay for me

Don't mind me if I just pat myself on the back a little. I'm back on the wagon (so to speak), the healthier lifestyle wagon this is. I had been going to the gym the last 3 or 4 months regularly but the last 2 weeks, I only made it over once. So today, I start again because I'm determined that no matter how many times I fall off the wagon, it's not to late to get back on. If at first you don't succeed....try try again and again and again and...you get the picture. I made it to the gym at lunch for an hour and I'm tired but happy that I forced myself to get there. I'm going to shoot for 3 days this week and go from there. It really does help me. Not just physically but mentally. On the physical side, I have far less aches and pains in my back when I'm getting there like I should be. I'm also going to weigh myself tomorrow morning and begin tracking again. I still haven't decided if I'm going to post my weight here or not but once a week, I'm going to post the results. Go me!!!!

Friday, August 17, 2007

Good for another 2 years

My son had his standard 2 year checkup with the cardiologist and aside from having a little leaking in some little valvy thing (that's technical talk, don't try to understand it) he is doing great. His heart is strong and he is as healthy as a horse.

I'll never forget standing in the exam room when Blake was 6 months old, fully expecting the doctor to say that the murmur was benign, and he said he would need open heart surgery. I went numb and literally had to ask him to repeat himself. After he repeated himself 3 or 4 more times and I tried to convince him that my sons chest and heart were much to small for them to work on, I started to feel this sense of peace and assurance that everything was going to be okay. It was going to be a hard journey but ultimately I knew that everything was going to be okay. It was a difficult thing to watch my then 7 month old little boy go through but he is okay, more than okay, he is so full of life and love that sometimes it seems as though he's trying to live 2 lives just to make sure he makes the most of it. I am thankful to my Heavenly Father for that assurance through the holy ghost that everything was going to be okay. I am thankful that I sit here now listening to him splash and play in the tub. I am just plain thankful.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Battle of the Bulge

This is something that I have battled all of my life as far back as I can remember and so far, I am losing. I never remember a time where I was happy with my weight. I always like to joke that I am an emotional eater. I eat when I'm happy, sad, mad, glad, stressed, it doesn't matter which emotion. I have always been this way.

My mother was an awesome cook and I grew up in the south where everything was better when it was breaded and fried. So, you would think after struggling with this for nearly 36 years that I would have a handle on it but I so DON'T. Every year or so, I'll resolve to lose the weight once and for all and I'll lose a good bit of it but inevitably, I will gain it back and then some. Currently, I have lost about 26 pounds over the last several months. I was really inspired this time when we had a "weight-loss" challenge at work and we all did really well. Not surprisingly (at least to me) as soon as the challenge was over, I have gradually started back-sliding and have gained back a few pounds.

Why oh why, do I repeat this behavior over and over again. That is the million dollar question. I know the right things to do, I know how to work out, I know how to eat right, I know what plan works best for me (weight watchers) and yet, my desire for the bad stuff seems to win every time. I am the poster child for yo-yo dieting. I know that I will never be a skinny person and I am okay with that but I am just not comfortable in my own skin anymore.

I've never had a self-esteem problem (shocking isn't it). I can thank my mom for that "thanks mom". But lately I am so aware of my size and that it's uncomfortable and I fidget and I want to fix it. My knees have paid the price already and I don't want to be looking back a decade from now and writing the same story about still being in this battle. I want to win not only this battle but the war.

I have decided that I'm going to start blogging about it. I might...I said might even get brave enough to post my weight here maybe it will help with accountability. We finally purchased a scale so I have to face the truth on a much more regular basis.

No more excuses.....NO MORE. More on this to follow.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Our new bishop and other church happenings

New things happening . Well, last Sunday, a new bishop was called for my ward. This is the first and only ward that I have been in since I joined the church 5 1/2 years ago and the outgoing bishop was the only bishop I had ever had so there was some sadness to see him go but he has served so well for 8 years and done a wonderful job and I do know in my heart that it was time. It just so happens that the new bishop that was called is a very good friend of mine and my family. He and his family have been my "church family" since 2 months before I was baptized and I have leaned on them heavily to support me as I have been the only member of The Church of Jesus Christ in my family (so far). He has been my real estate agent, my insurance agent, my financial adviser and our home teacher all this time. Now he is my bishop. Wow, that is going to take some getting used to. His wife is one of my dearest and most treasured friends. He is a great man and it feels right that he was called to lead our ward. I'm just going to have to figure out how to separate my friend from my bishop. It's only been a few days and I'm sure we'll figure it out. In other church news, my hubby is taking the missionary lessons again. He started last week with the first one and last night he had a second lesson. I was not going to share this here on the blog because it is a private thing for him but he gave me permission to do so. He is such a good man and I am so proud of him for trying to search and find the truth. Regardless of his decision, to either get join the church or not, I will love him forever (and I'm not just saying this because you are reading this Tim) I would be lying if I didn't say that I am excited at the prospect of having a priesthood holder in my home. Someone to study scriptures with, pray with and lean on. It would be a dream to be able to someday be sealed to him and my son. I try not to go on to much about it because I don't want to pressure him. I want him to join because he has gained his own testimony about it, not because he wants to please me. It's hard enough to be a member of this church, he need to believe it for himself. I am just trying to be there for him and answer the questions when he asks them. I've been where he is right now not that long ago and it's not easy. I just love him for trying. What more can I say.

Pondering life

Lately, my son has been really starting to ponder life and has been asking all kinds of questions about various topics. It's been really fun to watch him try understand at a deeper level all the things that go on around him. I often don't know how to answer the questions that he comes up with but I do my best. Here is a little gem from last night. He is sitting on the toilet and I'm in the computer room which is nearby when I hear "Mom, why does my food turn into poopy?" To which I so cleverly answered him "Well, it just does honey" which seemed to satisfy him for the time being. He also brought home some "work" from preschool that he did which was a self portrait and I noticed that he had drawn really big ears on himself so I said "Blake, why are your ears so big" and he said "So, I can be a better listener" If only I had known that earlier, I would have had his real ears enlarged. He's also starting to get a little "big for his britches" as my mom would have said, which results in comments like this. I picked him up from preschool and when he's had a good day, I usually give him some kind of treat like a couple of starburst or some kind of candy. Well it just so happened that I got a phone call right when we got in the car so I couldn't attend to the "treat" duty right away. He lets us get about halfway home (I'm still on the phone) and he says "Mom, excuse me, you are really cutting into my getting a treat time". At least he said excuse me right?

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Overheard at my house

This last week the dryer died and my son said

Him: "Mom, I know why the dryer died"
Me: Oh yeah, why?
Him: "Yep, you used it to much"

Why didn't I think of that? I knew that I did too much laundry but now I have proof. What a smart boy :o)

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Trials

I know that trials are a given in this life and my mind does understand why we have them. One of my favorite quotes is "Trials and tribulations are mandatory, misery is optional." That said, it can be so difficult to watch some you love go through them. My poor mother-in-law is very sick. Her kidneys failed in late December 06 (due to diabetes which she has had for a long time) She has been on dialysis since. I had no idea how difficult this was on someone. It would be one thing if she was healthy to begin with but she has high blood pressure, the affor-mentioned diabetes, hardening of the arteries and she has had several small strokes. She has been trying to get on the donor list for a kidney. This process is so much harder than they make it look on TV. Doctor after doctor, test after test. She had a liver biopsy this last Thursday. If it is positive for whatever they are looking for she will need chemotherapy The night of the biopsy she went to the ER and is now in the hospital for high potassium (a side effect of kidney failure) and now she needs her gallbladder out. I just don't know how much more her poor little body can take. I feel so helpless. I wish I could take some of this for her but I know that I can't. So, I pray. That is all I can do because I know that Jesus Christ has felt this pain she is going through and can ease her burden. She just has to be okay in the long run because I just can't bear the thought of the alternative. I have been a member of this family for 14 years and I love her dearly. My son loves her dearly. I have lost my parents already and I don't want to loose her too. If you are reading this and are the praying kind, please say a little prayer for her. I just have to have faith and someone convince her to do the same.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Sweet freedom

Yesterday, I complained about waiting on hold for several hours trying to hook up my wireless router. I wondered if it would be worth it...Well, the answer is a resounding YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Tonight I sit downstairs in the recliner, no longer chained to my desk upstairs, writing my post. As a friend said, 3 hours is a small price to pay for SWEET freedom. I used to wonder what I did without the internet and now I wonder how I lived all this time without wireless capability. I have been missing out for sure. So, that said, thank you Mr. Keep me on hold forever, thank you for my new found freedom.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

3 hours of my life that I can never get back

I know that we've all been there. Sitting on hold for the 40th time (for just 2 to 4 minutes the professional voice says on the other end) while I wait for him to fix my modem and my DSL. Let's face it, I'm at his mercy. It doesn't help that he's very polite for the 30 seconds he comes back every 2 to 4 minutes. How can I be mad at him when he's doing his very best. Uggghhh, I dislike holding on the phone. All I wanted was a wireless modem. Is that to much to ask? Should that really take 3 hours to get installed and working? But I digress and with any luck, I will be working from home tomorrow downstairs with my laptop and my walking around unplugged freedom. I would also like to thank the man or woman that invented speaker phone so that I don't also have a kink in my neck to go with the headache from the hold music.

Friday, August 3, 2007

Sweet moments

Last night I went in to check on Blake and see if he was asleep yet. When I got in there the conversation went something like this

Me: Blake, you really need to go to sleep
Him: Mommy, I need just one more hug and a kiss
Me: Okay, stand up
Him: He stands up and wraps his little arms around me and puts his head on my shoulder and says "Mommy, can we just dance for a few minutes" (he has always listened to lullabies as he goes to sleep and the CD was still playing)
Me: Sure honey

And we stood there, him standing on his bed with his head on my shoulder and we swayed slowly to the music. After a few minutes, I lay him back down and he says "Mommy, I love you" What more could I ever ask for in this world. Nothing, not one thing could be better than a moment like that. I am truly blessed.