Goodbye to a great man

Gordon B Hinkley June 23, 1910-January 27, 2008

Words can't express what President Hinkley has meant to me and my own personal testimony over the years. I never met the man in person but was counseled over and over again by him through the many talks that I listened to .

I'll never forget the first time I watched him before I even seriously considered joining the church. I knew even then that there was something special about this man. His ease in speaking to you in a way that was never talking down and often laced with humor.

It is a great loss to me and every member of our church but what a sweet reunion for him with his dear wife and family. I will miss you President Hinkley but will never forget you and what you have meant to me and my own personal testimony. You made me want to be better and do better and I will continue to strive to reach these goals.

Being a mom

My most fabulous and very talented friend Kim has asked"

"How about telling us a bit about what it's like for you to be a mom? "

If you look here and here you will see the of our journey to parenthood. Let's just sum it up by saying that it was not easy.

I still sometimes catch myself looking at him and thinking "Really, he's ours, for keeps?" I can hardly believe and it's been 5 years. I can't really remember what we did before we had him. He has brought so much joy, laughter, tears, meaning etc. to our lives.

I really never knew that you could love someone so much. I mean, I love my husband and parents with all my heart but there is something about the love I feel for my son that I can't explain. It's an all consuming kind of love. It's a "my heart just my burst if it grows much more in love with you" kind of love. For me, this was an instant thing. I didn't know for sure how I would feel because we adopted but all of the doubt just melted away when they put him in my arms. I knew he was the one I had been waiting for. It also amazes me how the "mama bear"comes out so quickly if I feel that he's threatened. What is this thing that makes me feel that I could easily claw someones eyes out if they hurt him?

Sometimes, I just pray that I'm not messing him up to badly. He's on to the fact that I'm not perfect and has seen the worst of me. I hope he can forgive my shortcomings.


I hope someday he can understand just how much he's brought to my life. What a sense of purpose he has given me. I would hazard to guess that day won't come until he holds his own child.

I could cry when I think about what his life would have been like with his transient birthmother. I'm so thankful she entrusted him to us. I hope he never feels that he wasn't wanted because there are not 2 people in the world that wanted him more than his daddy and I.

I could go on and on about what it means for me to be a mom. I will just finish with saying that I am so thankful that Heavenly Father blessed me with him. He is mine. I can feel it. He was meant for us. I'm blessed beyond measure and my heart is full.

Oh Happy Day!!!

My mother-in-law who we affectionately call "Ma" is scheduled for her kidney transplant on February 11th......YIPPEE!!!

Kory (hubs brother) is a match and will give one of his kidneys to his mother on this day. This is indeed an answer to many prayers by many people. This has been such a year and 1/2 for her and it's not over but maybe, just maybe we can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Thank you all for your prayers on behalf of our family. I really appreciate it and I know they do too.

Did you ever....

Write a really long and whiny pity party post and then decide to just get over yourself and not post it? Yeah, me either.

So.....my sweet bloggie buddy Yvonne asks

How did you and hubby meet? We met through a mutual friend. Well, to be honest I was kind of sort of dating the friend. It was sooooooo not serious. I'll never forget the night we met. I thought to myself, "Wow, I have just met someone that is going to be a great friend"

Little did I know that the "friend" that introduced us was a total major jerk and that I would turn to Tim to talk about how he treated me and I would fall head over heels in love. I invited him to my 20th birthday party and we stayed up into the wee hours talking and talking. The rest was history. We have rarely been apart since.

We have literally grown up together. It hasn't always been easy but it has always been worth it. Way more good than bad. This May we will celebrate our 15th year together. I would say that we have beaten some odds there.

Oh, and I was right about him being a great friend. In fact, he is my best friend in the whole world. I can always count on him to be there for me. He's seen me at my best and at my worst and remarkably, he's still here. He is the most forgiving and loving person that I've ever met. I don't know what I did to deserve him but I'm awfully glad I did it.

What was your favorite year in school and why? I had a blast all through high school. I went to a very small school. I graduated with 52 people. I had known most of these people since 2nd grade. Everyone knew everyone. I had a great group of friends. I was in band and I was a cheerleader and loved everything about it. It was great!

Prayer Power

Well, as you might recall (or not) my mother-in-law has had kidney failure since Dec 06. She has been on dialysis all of this time and it has been very hard on her. It turns out the dialysis only does about 10% of the work that a functioning kidney would do. Also, as it turns out, transplants don't work like they do on TV where you find someone willing and "abracadabra" it's done. It's a very complicated process just to get on the donor list with or without a will subject.

The good news is, we might finally have a match for the donor kidney. Her youngest son Kory. He has the last of his tests tomorrow and we will find out Wednesday if it is a go or not.

So, if you can find it in your hearts would you lift a little prayer on high for this to be a match. I would greatly appreciate it and I know they would too. I know the power of prayer first hand and I believe it can help. As I mentioned, her son's name is Kory and her name is Pam.

Thank you all so much in advance and I'll get back to the question answering soon.

My wonderful blogging buddies

Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the great ideas. I was going to try to answer them all in one post and then I thought "Uh hello, don't you want to spread out all these great ideas over several posts" And I said to myself "Uh yeah...like duh" I often talk to myself like that. So in totally random order because I love all my BB's (blogging buddies) the same, I will answer these great questions starting with............





From BB Thalia she asks "How is the new job going?"

Well, I've been at my new job now 3 1/2 months so the learning curve is starting to decline a bit. I'm starting to actually understand some of the things that I'm saying/doing.

I do like that there are so many neat stores downtown and I've enjoyed eating lots of new kinds of food. I still feel like a fish out of water and I hope that I always feel that way. I don't want to become one of the people who walk to fast with their head down and never acknowledge anyone else is around. I don't want to forget my manners and not hold a door open if given an opportunity. I want to smile at people. I want to show kindness.

I get along well with my coworkers but we have very little in common. I guess I've always had jobs that were like a little family and think this job is just going to be a job and that is okay.

They keep me really busy and it's getting busier everyday. I met with my boss the other day and he thought things were going very well.

I appreciate the flexibility in this job. I am able to work from home when necessary and my hours are very flexible. All they care about is that you get the job done. They actually treat you like a professional...gasp, imagine that.

Thanks for the question Thalia.

Did you ever....

Sit down hoping to write the most fabulous post ever and then ......cue the crickets. I've got nothing. I feel emotionally and physically drained today. Tapped out. Stick a fork in me, I'm done. I think that about covers it. You get the idea.

So....now cue the really smart people who ready my blog. Any burning questions for me? Anything you have been just dying to know? I'm up for just about anything. Let er rip.

To young for politics?

Last night my hubby and I were watching the debate in South Carolina between the Republican candidates and my husband says to my son

"Blake, are you going to be a Republican or a Democrat?"

My son says

"A democrap"

Now, I don't mean to offend anyone because it would have been just as funny if it had been Republicrap. We just laughed out loud. I'm going to be sad when he starts saying everything right.

Daily Dose Award

My sweet bloggy friend Nancy has given me this wonderful award.

It is described as "It's for blogs that I must read every day without fail . . . They make you laugh, cry, think and feel connected every time you read a post..."

The funny thing is that her blog is one that I need to read everyday or at least every day that she has a post.

Thank you sweet lady, I appreciate you thinking of me.

Now, there are several blogs that fit this bill for me but I'd like to award this to one of the first blogs that I started reading and still can't live without.

Kim, this is for you! If you haven't seen this wonderful blog and met this amazing chick I would highly recommend it. She claims that the insanity is temporary but I'm beginning to wonder..LOL Kim, thanks for all your help getting my blog started and for continuing to support me in technologically challenged world.

Random thoughts and stuff

1) I have to work how many days this week? 5 you say? How is that humanly possible after having so much time off over the holidays? I wonder who made up the work week and thought that was fair. 5 days on and 2 days off. Sooooo not fair. Back to reality...blech.

2) All of us are well finally. No more icky tummies and all that good stuff. YIPPEE. We are thinking of just bleaching the entire house and starting over to kill all the germs.

3) We had a great "camp out" in our living room tonight. We read some from the scriptures, had tickle fights and ganged up on daddy. It's a new thing that Blake started where we get all the blankets and pillows and "camp out" in the floor with all the lights off. Next week we are getting smores fixings.

4) Don't you just wish you could record moments like #4 in your head forever? I wish I could switch on the camcorder in my head and lock the tape away somewhere safe in my little brain. Someday my son will grow up and be too cool for camping in the living room floor and I want to remember everything.

5) We sang this song in primary yesterday that touched my very soul. I think it is called "If the Savior stood beside me". We learned the first verse. The spirit was very strong as the children and the leaders/teachers sang about the Savior standing beside them and if they would change the things they say and do and be a kinder/gentler person. I have been thinking about it every since and hoping that I commit it to memory because it is a great reminder to me. I always want to act as though the Savior were right beside me because he is. That doesn't mean I do all the time but it is my goal.

6) One of my New Years Goals is to work on my food storage so I am making my first trip to the church cannery in a couple of weeks. I have no clue what this means but I think I'm going to come away with some good stuff.


Well, that seems like quite enough rambling for one day.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot

7) Capital One has the worst customer support EVER. I have had to deal with them a couple of times and both times were a lesson in patience. Someone got a hold of our credit card number so I needed to report the card stolen. You would think this would be easy right? WRONG?? I was transferred and put on hold and hung up on etc. One hour later....I think the card is reported stolen and I think we have some paperwork on the way but heck if I really know. The worst part is that they don't care. They could care less if I took my business elsewhere. ARGGHHH!! Ok, I feel better now. Do you think all this complaining has already ruined my goals in #5?

Is someone feeling better? You be the judge.

Some people eat black eyed peas for good luck on New Years Day

But not us, we like to do things out of the ordinary like going to the ER. Not sure what this will do to our luck for the rest of the year but I like to think that we got that out of the way so we're good to go in 2008.

So, as I mentioned, I have been sick with a tummy thing. Well, my son did not escape it and was pretty sick all day Monday. He went to bed Monday night feeling pretty crummy and woke up several times. The last time was about 4am and he had a pretty good fever going so we gave him some Motrin. It was at this time that he started complaining about his leg hurting. We thought it was strange but put him back to bed.

The next time I heard from him, he was calling out to me from the floor in the hallway at about 7am. He had tried to come in to our bedroom but didn't make it. He was crying and saying "Ow, Ow, Ow" over and over again while clutching and rubbing his leg. Now, if you know my son, you know that nothing stops him from being on the go from the moment he wakes up to the time he goes to sleep. He has a full speed motor and even when he "hurts" himself, he just brushes it off and keeps on going. So, it was really odd that he was doing this with the leg. I tried to check it out to see if there was something going on with it that was visible but other than a little swelling, it looked fine. He would not straighten it out or put any weight on it.

After a hour or so, it didn't seem to improving at all. I called his doctors office. Yes, they were closed for the holiday but thank heavens a doctor is always on call. After telling her the whole story, she felt we should go to the ER just to be on the safe side.

To make a long story a little shorter (we were there for 5 hours) He is fine. His fever was back so they tested him for a bacterial infection and everything looked fine except for his white blood count being a bit elevated. They sent us home with instructions to keep him off of it until he was comfortable and keep the flow of ibuprofen going. By the end of the evening he had slowly but surely started to put weight on it and walk around a bit.

This morning he is absolutely fine...it's like nothing happened. He is running, jumping, hopping and every other ing he can think of. He slept all night and is well rested. So, why am I working from home and keeping him here with me? Yeah, I'm asking myself that very same question. I think it's going to be a long day.

The whole thing was just to weird. I have no idea what or why but I'm glad he's better.

So, what does a bored mommy blogger do while waiting and waiting for test results? Well, she takes a picture with her camera phone of course. Doesn't he look like a sick puppy?